As a young married couple, a husband and a wife lived in a cheap housing complex near the military base where he was working.
Their chief complaint was that the walls were paper-thin and that they had no privacy. This was painfully obvious when one morning the husband was upstairs and the wife was downstairs on the telephone.
She was interrupted by the doorbell and went to greet her neighbor.
“Give this to your husband,” he said, thrusting a roll of toilet paper into her hands. “He’s been yelling for it for 15 minutes!”
[forwarded by Doug Hawkins]
Sam: Do you know the difference between a guest towel and toilet paper?
Bob: No…
Sam: In that case, don’t use our bathroom.
While carpenters were working outside the old house I had just bought, I busied myself with indoor cleaning. I had just finished washing the floor when one of the workmen asked to use the bathroom.
With dismay I looked from his muddy boots to my newly scrubbed floors. “Just a minute,” I said, thinking of a quick solution. “I’ll put down newspapers.”
“That’s all right, lady,” he responded. “I’m already trained.”
I bought a great new toilet seat recently.
On the label was a suggestion on how to clean it.
Although nice to have the option, I doubt I’ll take advantage of it.
My toilet seat, it seems, is “Dishwasher Safe.”