A short humourous break.
I asked my nephew whether he bought his wife anything for Valentine’s Day. “Yes”, he said, “I bought her a belt and a bag.”
“That was very nice of you”, I replied, “I hope she appreciated the thought.”
He said, “So do I, and hopefully the vaccuum cleaner will work better now.”
[forwarded by John Farrow] [Received from Mikey's Funnies]
While attending a Marriage Weekend, Walter and his wife Ann, listened to the instructor declare, “It is essential that husbands and wives know the things that are important to each other.”
He addressed the men, “Can you name and describe your wife’s favorite flower?”
Walter leaned over, touched Ann’s arm gently and whispered,
“Robin Hood-All-Purpose, isn’t it?”
And thus began Walter’s life of celibacy.
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Thanks to Jon for sending this in.
HUSBAND: When I get mad at you, you never fight back. How do you control your anger?
WIFE: I clean the toilet.
HUSBAND: How does that help?
WIFE: I use your toothbrush.
A new widow requested the epitaph “Rest in Peace” for her husband’s tombstone. When she later found he had left his fortune to his mistress, she attempted to get the engraver to change the carving. This was impossible; the words were chiseled and could not be changed.
“In that case,” she said, “please add ‘Until We Meet Again.’”